Counselling Clitheroe, Ribble Valley
07712 634475


There are numerous theories to explain why we hang on so strongly to the concept of self-blame. One such theory explains that if we can attribute our ill-treatment to something we did, then we can control whether this ill-treatment happens again in the future by learning to moderate our own behavior. It gives us a sense of control over being hurt again. By letting go of the fact that the abuse happened through no fault of our own, it means that we also have to let go of that sense of control - which is very hard to do because, ultimately, we want to be able to protect ourselves. However, learning and accepting that we do not have control over everything in our lives and everything that happens to us is a necessary part of healing. What we can take away from this however, is that we can take control of the healing process....and that can be a very empowering experience.  (taken from
Sophie Bibby